Mama's Birthday!

Isa sa dahilan kung bakit gustong-gusto ko ang month ng January dahil isa sa mga araw nito ay ipinagdiriwang namin ang birthday ni Mama. I am so lucky to have a Mom like her. Maraming taon ang pinalagpas namin at hinayaan lang na lumipas ang araw ng birthday nya na parang normal lang na araw pero this year will be different. We will make it special para maramdaman nya kung gaano sya ka-importante sa amin. Kulang pa ang araw na ito para ipakita ang importansya nya. Kaya naman kahit paano gumawaa kami ng paraan to let her feel that she's loved and appreaciated in so many ways. 

To the best Mom in the world: Happy Birthday Mama! One thing I learned from you is that you always give without expecting anything back. You love us unconditionally. You’re always there when everyone have left. You protect us from everything. You're the best. I thanked GOD for giving you in our life. Thank you Mama for everything. We love you so much.

Year 2014!

It's kinda sad kasi first time kong i-celebrate ang New Year sa office. Every year I'm always with my family kaso I can't control my schedule now kaya naman kailangan nasa office ako sa araw na toh. But I'm super glad I'm with my closest friends. At least kahit paano I can still find time to enjoy this day. Pare-parehas lang kami ng pinagdadaanan kaya okay na din. I started a year having breakfast with them along Libis sa Something Fishy. I don't have plans of creating New Year's Resolution kasi hindi ko naman nasusunod, ayoko na ulit ma-guilty. We went to Padre Pio's church to pray and be thankful for the non-stop blessings. The place is so calm that you'll find it the best place to talk to GOD. I thanked GOD for all the good things na binigay nya sa akin last year. I may have lapses sa buhay especially for last year pero okay lang, ang mahalaga natuto ako and I'm still continuing to live with His presence. Ngayong 2014, I'll try my best to make the most out of it. I am not getting younger. In fact I'll be turning 28 this year, ang bilis ng panahon. I have to focus on my life and my family. Ang love--isasantabi ko muna. I need to make good decisions and be stronger to everyday's challenges. 

My first plate for year 2014, hindi na ko magtitira everytime kakain ako. :)

watched "Pagpag" with Joey and Poy

Breakfast time at Something Fishy

Jollibee bonding after shift

The Gizmo Fun Run

I’ve never been a fan of walking, much more running. I did join few marathons when I was in Victory where we had this Race for Life marathon. That was a 10k run that I survived. But I never saw this one coming--joining again a marathon. This time it was a 3k run. Yeah, it’s still 3k. Poy, Nawol and I decided to register in the Superbook Gizmo Fun Run held yesterday at The Fort. I was very excited and at the same time nervous cause I don’t know if I can finish the run. I just thought I did the 10k run before and I finished it what more this 3k run. I had a sleepover again at Poy’ s house since the assembly time will start 4:30am and I live in Bulacan so I need to stay at his place to be able to make it. At the day of the run, I was happy with the shirt were wearing, looks like were real runners. We had our new running shoes. We never forget to take pictures as a souvenir. The venue was filled mostly with kids. It was like a family event. I love seeing families engaging in this type of activity cause you’ll see how bonded they are. Before the run, we followed some warm-up procedures. Then the run started. In the beginning I felt a bit tired already but after getting used to it, I guess I did just fine. We finished the 3k run with sweats running around our body because Mr. Sunshine is already on set. We took sips of water to hydrate then decided to have a good breakfast at Banapple with our friends who came by—Rogan and Eric. This was a sporty day I could say. I am looking forward to another event like this. But hey before I forgot, I saw one of my celebrity crush in this event—Benjamin Alves, a newcomer in GMA. Though I saw him from far apart I knew he’s looking pretty cute. J

Two Words Six Letters

I hate the fact that I’m giving up now. It’s barely in my mind for the longest time but I guess I have to do it. So I can spend more time for myself and the on the people around me. This is not really the real version of me but sometimes you need to change, for the better. Last December 8, 2013, I realized I have to end this crazy feeling I had for someone. I don’t know how to call him. I don’t want to put his name here because hacking is very easy. Let’s put a pseudo name. Let’s call him Mr. Hug. Why such name? That would be a secret unless he read about this and figure it out. I doubt cause he don’t even know he’s doing it. I had this feeling for Mr. Hug for a long time. I am a good actress cause I knew how to act in front of him normally. I should not use the word normal cause it’s really not. I guess I just have to pretend.  I don’t know when and how I started liking him. I just felt it. And it never stops. The feelings grew stronger and stronger every single day not until today I decided to cut it. Because I can’t tolerate it anymore. Who wants to look stupid? No one. This has been a decision I made so I can focus on myself.  Lately, this feeling began to scrutinize me. So I decided to let go. One of the most difficult thing a person will do for the sake of being free again from getting hurt. It’s kinda hurt letting go but if it’s for your own good then I have to do it. Love makes the world go round but what if love also makes your world doomed, then you really have to stop. In this case, I am doing it for I want to feel free again. From crying, wallowing and the non-stop feeling of getting jealous whenever you see him with someone. I know it’s gonna be ten times hard on my part but I can do it. I know in my heart I’ll get over him. I don’t believe in the saying that there’s really one guy you can’t get over it. I know we’ll get over it not right away but slowly. It’s always gonna be a long process. But eventually it’ll end. As for now, I think I’m surviving. There may be days I find it awkward that I would like to go back on my old self liking him but there’s also part of me dictating that I have to mean what I say. That is to stop. It’s killing me but I have to find my own remedy. I guess I’m gonna be fine when my hair grows back. So what’s these two words six letters I am trying to say---move on. 

Year End!

Last December 7, 2013 a cool Saturday evening, we just had our company’s year-end party. The venue was in One Esplanade located near MOA. I was very hesitant to attend this party because for my 3 years stay in Aegis, I never attend any party organized by the company. Why? Well, I am ot just in the mood. I am not into wearing party dresses, putting make-up on and walking in heels. Not just my forte after all. I live a very simple life, mainly shirts, jeans and flats, I’m okay with it. Plus the fact that I am not into crowded places. I am not a people person. I lack confidence in front of many people. But since it’s mandatory, I don’t have any choice. I am thankful I’m with my circle of friends. I guess I’m good with it. We met at Nawol’s house. Nawol’s family has been very kind to us ever since the very beginning. We love her family so much.  But let me rewind from the previous week. We are all busy preparing for the party. My first ever party at work. We raid each malls looking for a dress, accessories and shoes. I got mine at People are People for P499, not bad. It was a black tube dress. It was kinda big for my size but thanks to Mo cause she did d a good job repairing it. It turned out exactly what I wanted. Last time I wore a dress was when I attended my Kuya’s gig at Ortigas way back year 2012 and then followed by this day. I told you I am not a big fan of dresses. I made some sort of recycling with my shoes and accessories. I got my black gladiator pumps and the necklace gave my Ate. That worked well with the dress. The rest of my friends, they also have their own moments. During the party, we all had our own transformation, something you don’t witness on a daily basis. We looked pretty, elegant, sophisticated and different. Of course, were all shocked with the result but on a positive way. The boys had their own shining moments as well. They looked handsome and gorgeous. Minus the mafia look and the suspender thing. We ate, talked and took a lot of pictures. It was a blast not after the party ended. We argued on where place to go after the party. We all had our different opinions. We clashed. We felt cold to each other. We were quiet. We lost confidence. Were all in a bad mood. Our feet took us to Padi’s. The mood changed. We drank all night. We danced and forget about the arguments we had. Our friendship is so bonded that we don’t let little misunderstandings get in our way. Yeah, we may have our different views on certain things but we managed to overcome it. How? By living on what we have. By accepting each other’s flaws. There’s no perfect friendship. It’s the imperfections that made us stronger, bonded and well-loved.  That night I am also about to take one of the biggest risk I could possibly do in my life. At first I know I can do it but as the negative mood surrounded the place, it killed y confidence. So I kept hanging in. Until now. I guess it’s not the perfect timing. But I was a bit sad cause that would break my long years of waiting and speculating. Anyways, when we got back to Nawol’s place, we rewinded the things that happened that night. It was mixed emotions. And that untold story in Malate, I am thankful it remained as a secret. Not to the three of us but there’s one addition. You know who you are. It’ll come out in perfect time. And we’ll just laugh about it for it’s done already. I am not a bit ready now. Off to another year end party for 2014? Let’s see. :)

MU???

I was passing at the National Bookstore yesterday and I saw this book written by Noringai. I was about to buy it but then I found out my card was expired and I ran out of cash. So I checked and saw this through wattpad. I put it in my blog cause I kinda relate to this feeling. Very confusing. But I just thought I'll just go with it. Bahala na. Cause if it makes you smile why deprive yourself of it. I know there will be consequences and unti-unti ko na ngay syang nafi-feel. I'm a tough cookie I know, I'll go through this. Maybe not now, but soon. So I'll enjoy muna every moment and let myself worry later. Life is too short. I know I'm thinking too way stupid now but I can't help it. 

Playful Emotions

Sometimes you're wondering because you've been through different emotions for a week. You started the week so hyper and positive and ended it with a low, tired emotion. I blogged about this cause I'm kinda observant of my emotions for the past few weeks. Very unpredictable. There were times I almost hate everyone and don't want to go out and whine. And then comes a time that I was smiling. As in the whole day with a certain reason. My aura is so fresh and everyone around you noticed how blooming you are. Indeed, we are all surrounded with different feelings. Or should I say playful emotions. One day you're sad and the next day you're freaking happy. Say what?! My theory about his goes along on how the people around you and your environment affects you, literally positive or negative. You adapt their emotions. You feel what their feeling. You talk what they say. In short, they change you a lot. As for myself, how I mingle with people and how I accept every changes/feelings dictates what my emotion is. I find it peculiar that sometimes you should feel scared on something but then the result is totally opposite. It feels like it's nothing on you. Then when it's time for you to feel scared, everybody is okay with it. Dealing - that's the keyword. Each of us deals in every emotion differently. Sometimes too exaggerated. Sometimes just average. Or worst we almost burst out into tears. Our body had this magical glands that controls our emotions. Very powerful that we always respond to it knowingly or unknowingly. Lately my emotion is getting better unlike the previous weeks that's full of jealousy, selfishness and a bit of anger and insecurity. Yeah, emotions that I don't want to feel again cause I feel like I'm turning into a different person, the not-so-good version of me so enough with it. I am thankful that this week turned out to be my recovery week. I was smiling and I feel like I have a happy heart. I don't now how it happen but I will not contradict it anymore. I'm glad the soft-spoken, simpler version of me is emerging again. I promise to be a good girl from now on. I experienced how to be a bitch already and I am not cool with it so I stick to my old self where I can be contented on small stuff. Love can change you for it is being surrounded by feelings you can't control. But once you're used to it, you can be the best version of yourself. From now on, I will always try my best to create good emotions, someone with  a happy heart. Lovelovelove! :)